Friday, March 20, 2009

No offense, Ecuador, but...

  • The flag that's used to promote one of your political parties up for election next month is a gay pride flag where I come from and I laugh when I see it hanging on everyone’s houses here.

  • Your roosters are idiots. I know the sun rises early here, but I’m positive it’s not up at 2 am. Just because the dogs bark all night wake them up, it doesn’t mean they need to cock-a-doodle-doo the rest of the night for all they’re worth.
  • Why do you need to turn off the water for our apartment building at the most inopportune time? Like when I wake up sick in the night and then the toilet won’t flush. Lovely, thanks.
  • The gap in our bed is annoying. I’m tired of falling into it at night.
  • Was there really no other way for you to keep track of our clothes when we dropped them off to get washed other than to write our initials in permanent marker on every single sock and towel?
  • Did you really have to kick us out of your grocery store at 1 pm and tell us to come back at 3?
  • Why don’t you have Diet Coke?
  • Bologne is a very gross lunch meat.
  • Why do you have sneaky people that stole Jonathan’s camera right out of his pocket? That’s mean.
  • Your handshakes pretty much suck.
  • Why does no one have a Mac so we can get our dang hard drive to work?
  • It’s very difficult to get myself to take a shower when the water is hot then cold then kinda not that hot then freezing then warmish then freezing.
  • Yogurt, cheese, and lunch meats should be kept cold to keep them from making you sick. I would say milk and eggs too but I guess I’ll let you have those as exceptions.
  • Your ceviche was almost delicious. I only say almost because the fatty thick slimy pig skin you added in at the end was pretty nasty. But I ate around it.
  • Your policemen don’t do the best job at enforcing traffic laws. I didn’t really think you had traffic laws at first but then I thought the double yellow lines on the roads and the speed limit signs must mean something. Oh well… It does make for exhilarating and entertaining drives.
  • Your bus drivers are crazy.
  • Where are you hiding the tampons?! They have to be sold somewhere around here…. right?
  • I’m getting a little jealous that Jonathan might love the bread here almost as much as he loves me. That doesn’t seem right.
  • Why are 90% of the people here so small? It makes me feel like a big oaf.

Thanks. That was nice to get off my chest. On the other hand, Ecuador, you are awesome for…


  • Your CHEAP transportation,
  • Your delicious pineapples,
  • The indigenous people that walk their sheep, cows, pigs, donkeys, and kids on the sides of the roads we drive on. And for the awesome clothes they wear.



  • Giving Jonathan and me the opportunity to hang out together all day every day for 5 whole months,
  • Helping me become a better Spanish-speaker,
  • Having really friendly people everywhere,
  • Your beautiful countryside. Seriously, it’s right up there with Maui, the Swiss Alps, Ronda, Cinque Terre, Costa Rica, and Utah mountains.
  • Having KinderBuenos! Even if they are $1, which seems kind of expensive here,


                • Showing me how NGO’s are run here in South America,
                • Letting me learn how to cook with limited provisions,
                • Having cities where we can walk everywhere instead of drive,
                • Giving me the opportunity to help make people’s lives better, healthier, easier, and hopefully less poor,
                • Having the most delicious Hawaiian Pizza I’ve ever tasted in my life (fresh pineapple AND peaches!),
                • Your very cute children. Everywhere. My children will never look like them, but they’ll look like Jonathan who is ridiculously cute as well.
                • ...............................Above: Very cute...............................

                  ...........................Above: Ridiculously cute.........................

                • Your markets in Guamote on Thursdays and in Riobamba on Saturdays. Delicious, interesting, weird, funny, uncomfortable… a nice cultural experience all around.

                • Making me feel refreshed when I wake up at 6:30 am for the first time in my whole life. I don’t know how you pulled it off but I’m pleased.


                I had a slightly long week. I got some kind of little friend in my intestines that caused me to stay in my bed and the bathroom all day Wednesday. I blame him for causing me to vent about Ecuador. But I hope you all don't get the wrong idea. I do love it here and I'm havin' a blast (no pun intended).

                I know there are family and friends that read this blog that I don't hear from. I would love to hear from all of you. Leave me a comment or email me and let me know what you're all up to (you can leave comments even if you don't have a blog. Just click on the comments link and then choose the "Name/URL" option and give your name).

                ***UPDATE***

                Upon receiving a comment from a native Ecuadorian and re-reading the first part of this post, in which I vent a bit, I realized this post might be offensive to some people... Especially if they're from Ecuador. That wasn't what I meant to do. I love Ecuador so far and my positive experiences here are far outweighing the negative. My intent with this post was to let my family and friends know the differences in lifestyle Jonathan and I are experiencing here. Not bad things, just different things that we're not used to. If it makes you feel better, Ecuadorians, you guys are way better than most of the people I met in Spain... Oh crap, now I've offended the Spaniards.

                14 comments:

                David and Brooke Gallagher said...

                Amanda! You are such an awesome person! I am loving all your posts and glad you are able to write and share your adventures. Partly because I probably wont be going there any time soon! Thanks again

                Jerrea said...

                Very funny and sweet. I'm so glad you get to share this experience with your bff. What a great way to start a marriage!

                Michemily said...

                Great post. I'm guessing you're waking up refreshed because of fabulous new hormones you're getting to experience. Hee hee. My friend Tanya said she wasn't as sore after working out anymore after she got married. It's healthy. Good luck with your stomach friend. And that with the permanent marker is funny.

                Zuri said...

                I think you are staying at a small town. Services in small towns of Ecuador are not the best. But when you visit Quito or Guayaquil or Cuenca or Loja, etc. you will see that you can find whatever you want and good services.

                I lived in the US too and let me tell you that I also have a huge negative list about that country just as the one you posted about Ecuador.

                Zuri

                amanda said...

                Oh yes, Zuri, I think you could write a negative list about anywhere. I'm living in Riobamba, which I wouldn't consider a small town. I'm still exploring it and hoping to find a few more things I need but for the most part it's been great.

                My experience here in Ecuador has definitely been more positive than negative so far and as I travel to different cities in the country I'm sure I'll get a more complete idea of Ecuador. I hope I didn't offend you.

                Lindsay said...

                There weren't any tampons in Paraguay. If you want me to send you some, I can! Reading your list, pros and cons makes me miss Paraguay (especially the cons--their difficult, but so awesome at the same time!).

                Much love.

                Tiffany said...

                Amanda--I will send you anything you need too! Just let me know. For real. Love you and wish you could be here for everything! :)

                cathy said...

                Don't worry, I had a post where someone was offended because I made fun of funeral food. I deleted it.
                I'm sorry that you got a little sick. It probably felt a little like I felt after I ate those horsemeat kabobs (or whatever they were) in Moscow.
                Congratulations on waking up at 6:30. That's 8:30 UT time, which is still an accomplishment!

                Jessica said...

                Right there with you on the tampons and shower problems. In Brazil, (I was in small towns the whole time I was there) I could never find tampons, and the showers where either hot or cold. But what good stories you will have to tell! The first trip to the grocery store in your hometown after you get home will be an amazing thing!

                Jill said...

                honestly Amanda, I laugh every time I read your blog! It is so funny! Thanks for keeping us updated on things.....and good luck finding tampons. Keep blogging!

                Sam and Rachelle said...

                Oo-man, I don't know how I would live with no tampons!! Although, you have had many offers, I too will send you some. They are a must:)
                As of your rants and raves, I love them. It's just life to love some things and find annoyances in others. Your human. lol.
                Keep the blogs coming! I really enjoy reading them from my jail cell...or um, desk at work.
                Hope you get well quickly.
                PS- Thanks Johnathon for the emails!! I love hearing both perspectives.
                Loves

                Miss P said...

                i love kinderbuenos! please bring home some. you will be my favorite married couple

                Sarah Williams said...

                I thought I would leave in my bit about tampons here since just about every girl did. First of all I don't love you enough to send you some tampons unless you send me Bueno bars...bueno? ...Second of all, the hospital charges 5 dollars for a box of 5 tampons! Just another reason why I need to take as much food with my free lunch as possible...and not feel bad about it.

                kristine gracey anderson said...

                I love the entry. You write so well and funny. I can just hear you saying it!!!! LOVE IT!! I am sorry to hear about your little friend eating all your food for you, and making you get rid of the rest. Believe it or not, reading all the crap you say about Ecuador is making me want to come even more! Get wait to get the next update!